Tuesday, 30 October 2012

That one moment

One moment,
enough to feel everything
enough to realize everything

*

Ever had those moments where you suddenly realized something?

That you're loved,you were wrong,you were...I don't know,not who you are?

I have few of those moments
Bear with me,this is a long post

I enjoy reading novels,usually Harry Potter during my free time
That one day,I woke up and stared at my notes on the wall

Notes with everything I've experienced
I stared for at least 1 hour
I just couldn't do anything on that day
I need a break

I know,at that moment,I was tired
I have been trying to please people who doesn't know how to appreciate me for the past few months
and I'm exhausted


The second time this happened was few weeks ago
My key-ring went missing
I kept it by my side for 2+ years

It was impossible for me to misplace it
But it went missing

I should've known
it was time to let go

Probably someone pick it up

...or it just don't wanna be found


The last time this happened was on 7th of October this year
The time I just decided to stay isolated
But after overhearing what I'm not supposed to hear
I know I was never alone

There are always ways and chances for someone to be loved
  or to love someone

no matter if they deserve your love,take the chances
Either learn a lesson or gain a bonus in life

Staying still is safe,but it doesn't get you anywhere further

*

People don't change for no reason

1st
Sometimes I don't like to please people just for the sake of being in the circle
In fact,I feel uneasy around people I can't cope with

Some people talks a lot behind others,but they're still friends with the people they hate

I don't question that
but I don't kiss people's asses and take shit from them
Just because I can't be lonely

I didn't change,I just stop pleasing people I dislike

2nd
I used to carry this small little key-ring with me
It was broken at its first year
But I love it so much that I still put it in my pockets,purse or bag

I felt so safe when I brought it along
Like it was a part of me and will always be

I always thought I would never misplace it
but it happened.

Things change in life,they come and go for their own reasons
They may come back or not at all
you either wait for it or just move on with your life

In my case,I just have to let go of it
Maybe this way I will be happier

Maybe he is happier now too.

3rd
I like the phrase 'one in a million'

You see,some people think materialize things can be replaced easily
Some people think you can just get new friends whenever you lost your old ones

Not really

I met my best friend,got my own photo frame,video
They are all the one in a million things to me

Different people,places and things have different meanings to people

Everyone have their own unique taste or feelings towards someone or something

I've always thought my chances of meeting someone who's one in a million is already gone
I lost someone who took me for who I really am years ago

I regretted and never met that kind of person again
But then things changed

I am so glad that I have the chance of meeting 2 of these people in the crowd


Life's constantly changing,don't try to feel secure with not changing at all
After all,you only live once *YOLO! lol*

Friday, 5 October 2012

至:我的那些年

虽然很落后了,但我终于看了'那些年,我们一起追的女孩'这部电影

也因为这部电影,让我想把已经生锈的华语拿出来献丑

*
我不知道你是我的柯景腾还是沈佳宜
我只能说你是我的那些年

2年
说多不多,说少不少

这2年不管面对着什么问题时,总会觉得"你在身边的话,有多好"

但我相信你不想听到我这么说,所以你给我的一字一句我都牢牢地记在心里

成长是永远的路途
有些人,到了死胡同就不会再转出来,干脆在那里住下来
有些人,怎么转也转错路,错过很多美好的事物

而我,不断地徘徊在那个分叉路口

走不下去,也选择不了

一直到今年年中
遇到了一个让我明白我到底要什么的人

虽然到最后我们不得不为了一些难理解的原因分道扬镳

朋友问我: "他有怎样吗? 你又怎样了? "
我能答的只有: "我不知道他怎么了,但我过得很好。"

朋友们不相信我没事,也难怪的

这我才明白当时你的感受
或许在这时经历所谓的低潮期

会特别花时间去想了很多很多的东西

才知道,我真的有好好的珍惜过他
而当你知道没结果的时候,就该放手
把伤害减到最低

也不愿意为了一时的不甘心,勉强地把两个人的未来绑在一起

而且
被你喜欢过,让我觉得其他人都没那么喜欢我 *摘自九把刀*

当个成熟的人很不容易
所以我很佩服你能包容以前那个幼稚的我

你说你今年毕业
我也不能肯定自己会不会去祝福你

但我想在这里先好好地告诉你:

" 人生的路真的很长很远,谢谢你曾出现在路途中给我带了一段路。也谢谢你的旅程中
有过我的存在。就算再也不能听说你的故事,我希望你以后有什么困难都能走过去,面对
什么挫折也能站起来。

虽然陪在你身边的不会是我,但你的好总会被发现,在你遇到那个人的时候就请记得
我给你的祝福。愿你能永远幸福。"

*
我也不再一个人面对选择和挫折

即使这个世界怎么变,始终有些人不会变
也总有人会疼惜自己

曾几何时,我从放不下你的班级毕业了
即使不能回到过去,也拥有能翻阅的回忆

谢谢你让我明白幸福是什么

谢谢你,我的那些年
我们是永远的朋友

Friday, 28 September 2012

it's enough

Forgive me if you think whoever I wrote here is you

I had enough

Enough of you go around talking like it's my fault

I didn't mean that I'm angry
I just had enough

If you think I ruined your life so much
Then stop mentioning me in your life

Regret? Disgusting? Can't even imagine?

BULLSHIT

I had some down times with you guys but did I go around talking about it?

How did you guys act
People can see it,and I don't even need to tell them about it

Use your brains
If I wanna talk about you guys

I have plenty to tell
But did I?

I DIDN'T

I believe in my own choice
And I won't try to change yours or others'

Listen carefully

I made some mistakes
But it doesn't mean that you guys had no fault at all

Whatever you did were right and I was wrong?

Come on
If you were not sorry to me,nobody will comment about you

When I did something wrong,you guys talk talk talk
Ya I was wrong,I tried to learn from my mistakes

But when you did things I hate
Did you do anything about it?

Crap about it everywhere visible?

Please,imagine if I do the same thing to you
It will never be a good experience

Who are you to comment about it?

*
Again,I have to stretch

Please don't add any imaginary stories to this

I need MY BLOG to vent my feelings

I'm okay :)

Tuesday, 21 August 2012

He is a lover

I know I rarely do this but please read these carefully

This is about my little lover

This,is Lucky
A mixed-breed of German Shepherd & Golden Retriever adopted in a morning market

He enjoys laying on my arm & wait me to pet him
He can't stand me leaving him alone but sit still when I have to go
He lets me yell at him but still waits for me to calm down
He knows when he's wrong & waited to be forgiven
He will sit still & smile when he heard 'Look here,Lucky'

I didn't train him like a professional,but I like how it all works
As I'm the only one he will do a high-five without any treats

Yes,it's not about my boyfriend -.-

I love dogs
I enjoy looking at their movements & take more photos of them than myself

There are more than 800 photos of dogs in my drive

Every time I look at the photos,I'd wonder
Why are there so many animal abusing case?

Especially dogs,when you called them man's best friends

I found most of the dogs being abandoned & abused are mutts (mixed-breed dogs)
It rarely occurs to the so called 'purebred'

I hate people who judges dogs with their appearances

Let's be honest,most people here have Poodles as their first choice
Because it's cute,furry,and tiny

The most hurtful thing I felt for Lucky is when I brought him to DPC
the poodle came to smell him out and the owner went
'xxx,come back,he'll bite you'  'huge dogs are so busy body'

Hello,my dog is trained not to bite & bark when yours does

Also,since when are dogs' characteristics depends on their size?

I don't hold any anger towards little dogs that are more loved
I blamed people for rearing dogs just for their appearance

I wanted to ask

Did you buy a dog because of its appearance,or because you really love dogs?
Can you choose a mutt over a purebred if you have to?
Would you love a mutt as much as you love a purebred?

They love you for all the time they could

So what's the difference when a stray dog shows that love for you?

Love every furry friend your precious baby can meet
Not all dogs are aggressive,not all dogs bite

And there's never an aggressive dog breed
Only a owner who couldn't train them well

They are lovers
not dolls for you to dress
not sandbags for you to express


Monday, 23 July 2012

How to leave

Okay,I have to answer one of the most asked question of all time

How do you leave someone you love so much?
Is there really a way?

Is it really possible to leave them?

Yes,it is possible,and it hurts like hell

Every time they hurt you,you made up your mind
You wanted to leave

Wanted to leave so badly,yet your heart still ask you

'Really? You really want to leave him/her?'
'Are you sure?'

I'll admit I still have flash back whenever I went to places we've been together
I still remember how happy I was with them,with him,with her

But ultimately,you have to ask yourself

'Why am I thinking to leave at the first time?'
'Is it my fault? Or I should give a second chance?'

Personally,the only time I've faced this situation is when it's related to love & friendship
Some people only face this when it's related to love

I've been through a really really tough time to decide how to leave

Note,it's not only leaving the relationship behind
It's leaving your feelings
giving up on all the 'used to be'
reverting to normal friends,strangers,you name it

No matter how good you think that person might be
You have to decide,is he/she really good to me?

Should I keep our relationship?

It isn't healthy to cling on a relationship
Where you have to endure all the feelings alone
Where you find it difficult to tell him/her your real feelings
Where you get hurt & must stand up all by yourself
Where you knew it was not right for the both of you

Where the other one doesn't tell you 'It's us against the world,mate' or something similar

If it's hurting you,don't just weep
If it hurts the first time,go figure out what's wrong
When it hurts the second time,that just mean things aren't really working out

It's time to consider leaving

It is hard to leave someone who gave you so much happiness
But don't you think
if they could give you such happiness,why can't they figure out your sadness too?
Why couldn't you feel better?

Read carefully,if you're hurting that doesn't necessarily mean it's their fault

It maybe your own attitude problem
scan yourself before you go on telling everyone 'he/she hurts me'

I'm not a GURU
So at the end of the day,I'd only say

If you wanna leave,then leave completely
Don't linger around them because you're not a beggar

If you really don't want to,then change yourself
Complaining,whining & crying,they all don't help